Alyss - Months 4 and 5

Well, got pretty busy and didn't find the time to write in here but here's a little update on sweet Alyss. At her 4 months appointment she weighted 13 lb and was 24.5 in long. She was in the 50th percentile in all her measurements and the doc was pretty happy with how she looked. He suggested that I start feeding her cereal and fruits and veggie purées and even to let her drink from a sippy cup. I gave her cereal when she turned 5 months but haven't tried anything else yet. She still drinks breast milk and is happy with it. We'll continue with it as long as I can provide it. I think it's the best food an infant can have. At the doctors she also got her shots (two again, one in each leg) and a $80 check for being in the shots study. She's already earning her keep. Hahaha! After the shots she got a bit fussy and her right leg hurt a bit and even got a red hard bump that didn't go away for a month. In August will have the last round of shots in the study and after that just the regular shot schedule.
At 5 months Alyss is such a good and happy baby. She cries when is left alone (I think she might be getting separation anxiety) and when she is tired or hungry but otherwise she just plays, talks (she says "ba ba" and "ma ma", she gargles and blows and says the sounds 'p' and 'f') and smiles a lot all the time. She rolls over on both sides, holds her bottle and puts her binky in her mouth and is very curious and alert. I LOVE it when she looks at me straight in the eye and grabs either my face or my neck or even my arm if I'm feeding her. She likes to play with everything Jane plays with and loves to put everything in her mouth. She sleeps well but cries a few times every night to ask for a bottle. She drinks at least 10 oz per night and another 15 oz during the day. She's gotten pretty chubby and even cuter than she was before. Up until July 11th bunica took care of Alyss a lot and even had her sleep in the same bed with her a few times but since bunica left we've been sleeping her on the mattress that Jane used to sleep on and gave Jane the twin bed that bunica used to sleep on. Jane loves her new bed and Alyss loves hers. We all sleep in the master bedroom like a big happy family. :)
Jane's gotten more used to having Alyss around even though she still gets jealous and upset when I hold Alyss or tend to her. That's being a toddler for you. She's happy and tickles or plays with Alyss one minute and scratches her or pokes her in the eye the next. She does help me change Alyss' diaper or feed her and sometimes out of the blue she just comes and kisses Alyss on the head. I love watching them interact and play with each other. You can already tell that Alyss adores Jane. She looks at her a lot all the time, smiles and even laughs and squeals when Jane talks to her. She wants to play with everything that Jane touches. This annoys Jane sometimes, especially when she doesn't wanna be touched, but they manage to get along with some help from me. I hope they'll be good friends.
At the beginning of July we went to California and visited Disneyland and it was the first time for Alyss to go on a big trip, to meet great-grandma and great-grandpa Barlow and great-grandma Johansen, to go to the beach and in the ocean and to go to Disneyland. She enjoyed it all and was very good and only cried when she was really tired. She was also really good during the car ride there and back.
Great grandmas Barlow and Johansen and grandma and grandpa Jo when they came by to visit were very happy to meet Alyss this summer and loved to hold her and take care of her. They all marveled at how good of a baby she is.
Forgot to mention that Alyss won the Springville baby photo contest for "best eyes" in the 0 to 6 months category and a $10 Walmart gift card. She sure has beautiful, sparkly eyes.
We love you so much little Alyss and are so happy to have you in our family.

My first 4th

Huntington Beach - First time at the beach

Holding my bottle

Bunica and Alyss

Two Months Old Alyssuca

Alyss at 2 Months

Our little Alyss is already two months old and as happy as she can be. She eats a lot (about 3.5oz at a shot) and loves to sleep. If you interrupt her sleep she will make sure to let you know how unhappy she is. :) She is also really smart. She smiles a lot and when she sees videos of herself moves her arms and starts to talk. She talks quite a bit, especially when anyone looks at her and talks to her. She's grown 3.5 inches and gained 3 pounds. She weighs 10.6 lbs and is 22.5in long (50th percentile) which is great and very proportionate. The doctor said that she looks very happy and healthy and he also said that he didn't notice any clicks in her hips. We'll have to do another ultrasound at 4 months to be sure but until then he said that we shouldn't worry because he thinks that she's fine and healthy. I'm glad that my instincts that told me not to worry and that everything will be ok proved to be right so far. Even though my brain told me to worry, I never felt that she needed to be put in a sling and I had a feeling that she is ok. I hope that the ultrasound will confirm that.

Alyss at 2.5 Months

Since her 2 months check-up she had a runny nose but didn't upset her too much. We've been breastfeeding full time and she loves mommy's milk. We also have a lady friend who shares her baby's milk with us to supplement when mommy doesn't make quite enough. I hope to be able to keep this up at least until she's 6 months old. Another thing that she does that amazes me is that she moves a lot in her sleep. I put her on her back and she turns on her side and snuggles next to me. She sometimes lifts herself up on her elbow in her sleep too. We co-sleep, which I love and so I can take notice of everything she does. She goes to sleep for the night around midnight, after an entire day of sleeping most of the time, feeds a little bit around 3am and then sleeps until 8am when she feeds again in her sleep and sleeps until 10am. I love how good of a sleeper she is and I hope she keeps it up at night. 

Outside, in grandma Lucy's arms

At her 2 months appointment Alyss had her first round of shots and we're participating in a study where they combined 3 vaccines into one so she only got 2 shots instead of 3. She reacted really well and didn't get sick. She was a bit fussy the day of and got a small lump at the injection site but it all went away within a day. It was a little sad to see the nurse draw blood from her little arm and to see her and another nurse stab Alyss with a shot in each leg at the same time but it all went away pretty quickly and she calmed down almost immediately after I picked her up in my arms. 

Cute smile

I love to feel her little body close to mine. I love to kiss her round, chubby cheeks and her perfectly round head. I love to see her serene smile and to hear her coos. I love to see Jane look at Alyss with a lot of love in her eyes even though sometimes Alyss' cries upset her or she gets an little jealous when David or I hold Alyss. I love to see David hold Alyss and Jane in his arms or on his legs. I just love my cute family and my adorable babies. I'm so blessed to have them and David and I wouldn't change my life for anything. 

Updates

Alyss is such a tiny, sweet baby. She eats a lot and sleeps almost all night long and during the day quite a bit, and occasionally has some colics which make her cry but go away when I give her Cocyntal herbal drops. She is very alert and happy. She likes to be held and cuddles next to me in her sleep. We breastfeed but because I don't make too much (about 3.5oz every 4 hours) we also use milk from a friend who has a 4 months old baby and is kind enough to share her milk with us.

I feel better too. The episiotomy's healed more and doesn't hurt as much. At the 6 weeks check-up I received an IUC (IUD without hormones) which I can keep in as long as 10 years but can take out any time we want to try for another baby. I love not having to worry about birth control. I was pretty scared before I went in but even though the doctor said that I might be feeling pinches or pressure I didn't feel a thing and I sure was happy about it.

Having my mom here is wonderful and a lot of help. She takes care of Alyss a lot so that I could spend time with Jane and take naps during the day. We have a great time going on walks, eating at Burger King and watching Romanian television on her laptop. :)

Jane's gotten a lot better about accepting Alyss. She gives her the binky and the bottle even when ALyss doesn't want them :) and calls Alyss by name. On occasion she still gets upset but doesn't cry uncontrollably or throws huge fits any more. I really hope that they'll be best friends when they grow up.

Too many chocolate eggs :)

Alyss' First Easter

Cutie pie

Alyss's First Doctor's Visit at 2.5 Weeks

For Alyss's' first doctor's appointment we went to Dr. Tayler. The visit was pretty short and he said that Alyss is healthy but he had a couple of concerns. First, she only weighed 7.11lb, only 2 oz over her birth weight so Dr. Tayler suggested that I should try pumping more to make more milk or supplement with some formula. I've done more of the pumping and a bit of supplementing and hopefully she's gaining more weight. We'll recheck her weight at 3.5 weeks. Another concern he had was that he felt a click in her left hip so he sent us to the Primary Children's Hospital in Salt Lake to have an ultrasound. The ultrasound did show that her hip bones are shallow and underdeveloped (this is called hip dysplasia and apparently is pretty common) and the doctor said that we might need another ultrasound in a couple of weeks to see how things progresses and we might also need to see a Pediatric Orthopedist who might put Alyss in a sling for a couple of months. Dr. Tayler said that it doesn't look like she needs surgery but he does want her to be seen by an Orthopedist as soon as possible to take care of this problem. The rest of the visit went well but I was pretty shaken up by Alyss's loud cries when the nurse drew blood from her heel for the mandatory test that checks for some genetic diseases.
I've been feeling some weird feelings after this visit. With Jane everything went so well and smooth and she had no health problems. This time, even in the hospital the ear doctor was concerned after the first exam and wanted to recheck her hearing. Fortunately it all turned out ok and she has no problems but it already scared me a little. Now, it seems that Alyss needs to be put in a special sling to keep her hips in the right position so that they develop correctly. It really scares and saddens me and I've been thinking how hard it must be for parents of really sick children to see them suffer. I felt really sad and anxious when the nurse drew her blood or when the ultrasound tech pushed on her hips to get the pictures. Doctors and nurses seem so heartless. They all do their job and had to act as if they don't care that the baby is in pain and scared but I just have such a hard time watching them and not being able to help Alyss in any way, just try my best to comfort her. I really hope that Alyss will turn out healthy and okay and that both her and Jane will grow healthy and happy.

So tiny 

In her bear suit

I'm the big sister

Little sister

My baby and I

My other baby and I

34 Weeks Already?!?!?!

That's right. Believe it or not, I'm 34 weeks along. Only a few more weeks and Alyss will be here. Who knows, she might come a bit early. I wouldn't mind as long as she's healthy.

The last doctor's appointment went well, just like all the others. My blood pressure was good, urine good, measured 34cm and baby's heart rate was 148, also good. We've been discussing with the doctor what options do I have concerning the birth and after this last visit I really started thinking seriously if I want to try VBAC (vaginal birth after C-section) or a C-section again. We already have the C/S scheduled for the 15th of February (due date is the 20th) but I really felt recently that I'd like to try VBAC. The doctor isn't opposed to it but he said that he would need to refer me to a doctor in Provo or Salt Lake so that I could give birth at a big and well-equipped hospital, in case of an emergency and the necessity of a C/S. I've done some research and it seems that VBAC is totally possible and it can be successful but there is a chance for the baby to not get enough oxygen or for a uterine rupture. The main reason why I'm still considering the C/S is because with Jane I tried to deliver vaginally but, even though I dilated to 10cm she never descended and her heart rate was not very stable. I fear that it might happen again so I've decided to not get an epidural for as long as I can manage, and to walk around, not just lay in bed. I might even consider to get in the tub at some point. I remember that last time, even though the contractions hurt I felt better when I would stand and walk than when I stayed in bed and I got horrible back pain. I also hope that walking and standing will help the baby position herself and descend and also will help me dilate without the use of pitocin. They will not give me pitocin because it creates violent contractions, which could be dangerous for my previous incision. So, I feel good about trying VBAC and I really hope that I will be able to do it and not have to take tons of medications and endure the pain and recovery after a C/S. I want to be able to take care of my babies afterwards, with David working a lot and me being at home with both of them. We'll let the doctor know of the decission next week, at the next appointment, when I'll also ask him to check that Alyss is head down and getting ready to make her appearance into the world. I've been having Braxton Hicks contractions on and off and I feel pressure in my pelvis so I know that my body is getting ready for the big event. I also get occasional back pain and the aches in my pelvis, all the way around are pretty bad, especially after I go on walks but, just like last time, I plan on walking all the way until the last day. It makes me happy and I know it's good for me and the baby, plus Jane really enjoys our walks as well. Can't wait for Alyss to get here, to see her and hold her close. I'm nervous about what it's going to be like and how Jane will react but I'm also excited to have another little girl and the chance to be the Mommy of a newborn once more. I love being pregnant and I love babies and am happy that David is always by my side, supports me, comes to all the appointments and is just as excited about our baby girls as I am.

Jane is One Month Old!

I can't believe it. Jane is one month old already. It's been a pretty easy first month. We spent much time together getting to know each other. I can pretty much tell every time what Jane wants. It's pretty neat and interesting how such a small baby can communicate exactly what she needs and wants even though she can't talk and doesn't even hold her head up all the time. Speaking of holding her head, the first time she lifted it up by herself was when she was 5 days old. I had her on her tummy, propped up on my leg and she pretty much lifted herself a couple of times. It was so cool. Ch also started smiling around 3 weeks and now, at 4 weeks she smiles even more. We can't get her to smile but she does it when she feels like it.

We had our two week appointment and found out that Jane weighted 10 lbs (90 percentile) at the time and was 21 1/4 in long (95 percentile). I'm sure she's grown more since then. She is also healthy and progresses well.

We had some trouble with breastfeeding. At first I breastfed her exclusively but I was making very little milk so the nurses advised me to supplement with formula. We started her on Similac and she didn't fuss from hunger anymore but started spitting up more. We tried Similac with soy but that one smelled bad and gave her a lot of gas then finally decided on Similac Sensitive which seems to sit a little better with her. As I was hurting pretty bad, I started pumping and feeding her breast milk in the mean time and my supply increased a little but not a lot. After not giving her the breast for a while she didn't seem happy when we started that again but we're working on getting used to it again. It's just a little uncomfortable for her when the milk lets down and a gush of it fills her mouth. She chokes every time and starts crying. Sleeping's been really good the first month. She'd sleep about 4 hours straight every night and then she'd wake up to eat and be changed and would fall asleep for a few hours more. That changed recently. She sleeps in the evenings and nothing seems to wake her up but then she wakes up around 10pm and doesn't fall asleep until 1 or 2 in the morning. Then she sleeps for 2 to 4 hours after which she wakes up on and off all morning until around 2pm. We're trying to get her on a better schedule.

Her first bath (sponge bath) was pretty nice. She didn't cry much. She didn't cry when we gave her the first real bath either but taking her out of the water scared her, especially when she got cold, and that really made her cry. She doesn't mind the bath, just the after-bath experience.

My feelings had been a roller coaster this first month. In the beginning when I saw that I wasn't able to nurse her well I was really disappointed and felt like I wasn't a good enough mother for my little baby. When she didn't want to take the breast anymore after not eating that way for a couple of weeks I felt rejected and like I wasn't needed anymore. Those feelings went away as they came but it's interesting how many different feelings a new mom can experience. The feeling of being lonely and as if something was missing was something else I went through in the beginning as well. I realized that I missed my belly, feeling Jane inside me and having her with me all the time. I cried the first couple of times I left her with my mom or David at home. I knew that she was going to be ok but I had a really hard time leaving her. I still miss her a lot when I go somewhere without her and it feels so good when I come back and hold her and smell her. I love her sweet baby smell, I love staring at her tiny face and I could do it for hours, I love holding her small, light body in my arms, feeding her, playing with her, listening to her quiet sounds, kissing her chubby cheeks and her cute feet and I love it when she grabs me tight with her little hands or when she "kisses" me when she's hungry and looks for food everywhere. I just love Jane and am oh so happy to have her in my life.