Alyss at Two

Alyss loves Sulley and Monsters U

Fun on the slide

Disney Store in SLC

Happy Birthday our sweet Princess

Sulley cake made by daddy

Happy birthday our sweet Alyss!!!! Man, you're two years old! I can hardly believe it but you've grown so much and every day you show us more of your personality and of who you are and what you like.

Physically speaking, you still look like a toddler, with chunky legs and squishy rolls on your arms and cute, chubby cheeks but you are slowly transforming into a small child. Sometimes I think I see an older you when I look into your face but then I blink and your serene, innocent 2 year old face stares back at me. I just love your little face and everything else about you. I love you when you fight with me, when you bite your binky or when you throw yourself on the floor because I won't let you play with the iPad anymore. I love you when you cry and scream and I love you when you give me hugs and kisses and when you play wit Jane and when you love Kaley so much you can hardly stand it. I love how vibrant and spunky you are. I JUST LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU!

You are so lovely and smart and happy. You still copy many of the things Jane says but you are also becoming more and more independent and are learning how to use language in your favor. You are a talking machine. You know so many words and you put them together in sentences and are pretty easy to understand. The pediatrician is always amazed when she hears you talk, how coherent you are and how many words you know and understand. You also know lots of songs both in Romanian and English and you love to sing and dance. You also love to watch movies (Minions and Monsters being some of your faves) and to play on the iPad. 

I just thought of something really cute you do. You like to give me hugs and kiss me when I'm on the floor at your level, after I change your diaper. Yes, you're still wearing diapers even though sometimes you use the big potty and tell us now when you need a diaper change. It's a bit scary to let you run around naked because of the puddles and bombs we usually find all over the floor when that happens :) I guess this summer will be the time to help you learn more about using the potty all the time like all the big kids. And speaking of big kids, you also still LOVE your binky; so much in fact that you cry even when I move it from one onesie to the next. We'll see how we'll deal with ditching it but for now I just think that it's not that bad and that you'll eventually stop loving it so much eventually on your own.

Now, a bit about your actual birthday. We went to Chuck E Cheese in Orem with Eni, Lia, Rodica and Maria and their kids and we had a great time playing and eating yummy food. You love to eat and are a great eater. I love how you try almost everything and are good at sitting down and eating your food. After this party we went home where daddy had another party for you. He had made a Sulley cake and decorated the living room with Monsters U stuff. It was so cute and the cake was delicious. Your daddy is an awesome cook! You then opened the presents and loved everything you received. Jane liked your new toys so much too and you two shared the little ponies that you got.

Our dear Alyss, you are such a sweet little girl and we love you more than you can imagine. This kind of love cannot be explained and you will too experience it when you have your own children. We want you to know that we are proud of you and so happy to have you in our lives. You are an independent and very happy little girl. You are not afraid to try things and you show no fear even going down the tall slide for big kids. You show me every day that life is to be lived. We love you and hope that you'll stay happy and adventurous and will keep saying "no" and being the independent little person that you are. Te iubesc Alisucu' meu mic si drag!

Jane Christina Johansen

Jane Christina Johansen - Cute and Sweet

4.5 Years Old

4 Years Old

3.5 Years Old

3 Years Old  

2.5 Years Old

2 Years Old

1.5 Years Old

1 Year Old

11 Months

10 Months

9 Months

8 Months

7 Months

6 Months

5 Months

4 Months

3 Months

2 Months

1 Month

1 Day

Jane and her Twin Bed

Yes, you read correctly. Jane has her own twin bed and loves to sleep in it! We put the bed in our room, got her Tinker Bell sheets and put pictures on the wall. The first night she slept in it she woke up a couple of times and came over in our bed but after that she only cries a little around 4am when David gives her a bottle after which she goes back to sleep. We figure it's more for comfort that a need that she still asks for a bottle at night but we're ok with it. She'll stop when she's ready.

We are excited that she likes her bed and that she's growing up and becoming a child more every day. She's grown taller since she was 18 months and her legs have gotten slimmer. She has all her teeth and molars now, knows how to blow her nose and does everything she sees us do. She also talks a lot. Most of it is still hard to understand but there are words and phrases that we can make out. It's interesting that she understands both Romanian and English but many times she would use English unless she only knows the words in Romanian. I'm still determined to speak Romanian to the girls but will not yet enforce Romanian only in our conversations.

Other Jane updates: she practices jumping and going up and down the stairs without using handrails, sings the alphabet song, still dances when she likes a song, loves to play in the water and go to the pool and is very friendly especially to adults but to children as well. Whenever she sees one of our neighbors she smiles and says 'hi'. Everyone thinks she is really cute and pretty. And speaking of pretty, Jane won the 2012 Springville Baby Photo Contest and a $50 Walmart gift certificate. Way to go princess! We love you and love watching you grow and turn into the beautiful girl that you are.

People's Choice Award

Alyss - Months 4 and 5

Well, got pretty busy and didn't find the time to write in here but here's a little update on sweet Alyss. At her 4 months appointment she weighted 13 lb and was 24.5 in long. She was in the 50th percentile in all her measurements and the doc was pretty happy with how she looked. He suggested that I start feeding her cereal and fruits and veggie purées and even to let her drink from a sippy cup. I gave her cereal when she turned 5 months but haven't tried anything else yet. She still drinks breast milk and is happy with it. We'll continue with it as long as I can provide it. I think it's the best food an infant can have. At the doctors she also got her shots (two again, one in each leg) and a $80 check for being in the shots study. She's already earning her keep. Hahaha! After the shots she got a bit fussy and her right leg hurt a bit and even got a red hard bump that didn't go away for a month. In August will have the last round of shots in the study and after that just the regular shot schedule.
At 5 months Alyss is such a good and happy baby. She cries when is left alone (I think she might be getting separation anxiety) and when she is tired or hungry but otherwise she just plays, talks (she says "ba ba" and "ma ma", she gargles and blows and says the sounds 'p' and 'f') and smiles a lot all the time. She rolls over on both sides, holds her bottle and puts her binky in her mouth and is very curious and alert. I LOVE it when she looks at me straight in the eye and grabs either my face or my neck or even my arm if I'm feeding her. She likes to play with everything Jane plays with and loves to put everything in her mouth. She sleeps well but cries a few times every night to ask for a bottle. She drinks at least 10 oz per night and another 15 oz during the day. She's gotten pretty chubby and even cuter than she was before. Up until July 11th bunica took care of Alyss a lot and even had her sleep in the same bed with her a few times but since bunica left we've been sleeping her on the mattress that Jane used to sleep on and gave Jane the twin bed that bunica used to sleep on. Jane loves her new bed and Alyss loves hers. We all sleep in the master bedroom like a big happy family. :)
Jane's gotten more used to having Alyss around even though she still gets jealous and upset when I hold Alyss or tend to her. That's being a toddler for you. She's happy and tickles or plays with Alyss one minute and scratches her or pokes her in the eye the next. She does help me change Alyss' diaper or feed her and sometimes out of the blue she just comes and kisses Alyss on the head. I love watching them interact and play with each other. You can already tell that Alyss adores Jane. She looks at her a lot all the time, smiles and even laughs and squeals when Jane talks to her. She wants to play with everything that Jane touches. This annoys Jane sometimes, especially when she doesn't wanna be touched, but they manage to get along with some help from me. I hope they'll be good friends.
At the beginning of July we went to California and visited Disneyland and it was the first time for Alyss to go on a big trip, to meet great-grandma and great-grandpa Barlow and great-grandma Johansen, to go to the beach and in the ocean and to go to Disneyland. She enjoyed it all and was very good and only cried when she was really tired. She was also really good during the car ride there and back.
Great grandmas Barlow and Johansen and grandma and grandpa Jo when they came by to visit were very happy to meet Alyss this summer and loved to hold her and take care of her. They all marveled at how good of a baby she is.
Forgot to mention that Alyss won the Springville baby photo contest for "best eyes" in the 0 to 6 months category and a $10 Walmart gift card. She sure has beautiful, sparkly eyes.
We love you so much little Alyss and are so happy to have you in our family.

My first 4th

Huntington Beach - First time at the beach

Holding my bottle

Bunica and Alyss

Alyss's First Doctor's Visit at 2.5 Weeks

For Alyss's' first doctor's appointment we went to Dr. Tayler. The visit was pretty short and he said that Alyss is healthy but he had a couple of concerns. First, she only weighed 7.11lb, only 2 oz over her birth weight so Dr. Tayler suggested that I should try pumping more to make more milk or supplement with some formula. I've done more of the pumping and a bit of supplementing and hopefully she's gaining more weight. We'll recheck her weight at 3.5 weeks. Another concern he had was that he felt a click in her left hip so he sent us to the Primary Children's Hospital in Salt Lake to have an ultrasound. The ultrasound did show that her hip bones are shallow and underdeveloped (this is called hip dysplasia and apparently is pretty common) and the doctor said that we might need another ultrasound in a couple of weeks to see how things progresses and we might also need to see a Pediatric Orthopedist who might put Alyss in a sling for a couple of months. Dr. Tayler said that it doesn't look like she needs surgery but he does want her to be seen by an Orthopedist as soon as possible to take care of this problem. The rest of the visit went well but I was pretty shaken up by Alyss's loud cries when the nurse drew blood from her heel for the mandatory test that checks for some genetic diseases.
I've been feeling some weird feelings after this visit. With Jane everything went so well and smooth and she had no health problems. This time, even in the hospital the ear doctor was concerned after the first exam and wanted to recheck her hearing. Fortunately it all turned out ok and she has no problems but it already scared me a little. Now, it seems that Alyss needs to be put in a special sling to keep her hips in the right position so that they develop correctly. It really scares and saddens me and I've been thinking how hard it must be for parents of really sick children to see them suffer. I felt really sad and anxious when the nurse drew her blood or when the ultrasound tech pushed on her hips to get the pictures. Doctors and nurses seem so heartless. They all do their job and had to act as if they don't care that the baby is in pain and scared but I just have such a hard time watching them and not being able to help Alyss in any way, just try my best to comfort her. I really hope that Alyss will turn out healthy and okay and that both her and Jane will grow healthy and happy.

So tiny 

In her bear suit

I'm the big sister

Little sister

My baby and I

My other baby and I

The Perfect Birth Experience - Alyss Lucy Johansen

Alyss Lucy Johansen

Holding Alyss for the first time

Daddy introducing Alyss to Jane

During the third trimester I've been really contemplating the idea to VBAC and started going to a clinic (Valley OB) in Provo to get ready to deliver at the Utah Valley Medical Center.
So, after a great second pregnancy the time has come to give birth to our baby daughter. My desire to VBAC was taken into account and when we went to the doctor for the 39w2d appointment, he decided to strip my membranes (ouch, that really hurt) to hopefully start labor early. He also suggested that we should be induced before 40 weeks to keep the baby small and hopefully easier to deliver vaginally. The induction was set for Friday, Feb 17th. I did get some more bloody show and some contractions but they were irregular and didn't really start labor.

We showed up at the hospital at 7am and sat around for a couple of hours before the doctor came and broke my water. I was having some contractions on my own before he broke my water but they were not strong or regular so I was given oxytocin to help with the contractions and the dilation. After I was given the oxytocin and my water was broken I started getting stronger and more painful contractions to the point where after about two hours I asked for some pain medicine. I was given a narcotic that took the edge off the pain and helped me get through contractions easier. However, even with the narcotic, after another hour I felt that I really needed the epidural, which was administered around 11am. It felt really good when the epidural started working and I could relax a bit and get some rest. At this point I was 6 cm dilated. Since I was pretty sleepy I tried to sleep a little but after about another 30 minutes the doctor came to check up on me and announced that I was dilated to 10 cm and it was time to take me off the epidural and have me start pushing. Both David and myself were really surprised that I progressed so quickly (it took 10 hours for me to get to 10 cm the first time). So, we started pushing (I was at stage 0 at that time) and immediately the baby's head started showing. After pushing for about 20 minutes and needing an episiotomy (thank goodness that I was numbed up and didn't need any other shots for that) Alyss Lucy Johansen was born and David got to cut her umbilical cord. The entire birth took 3 hours and 50 minutes!

Alyss weighted 7lb 10oz and was 19in long. After the nurses cleaned her up a little bit and put some drops in her eyes they brought her to me and put her on my chest. I was so happy that I was able to deliver her vaginally and that she was so beautiful, healthy and perfect. They took her away to get her really cleaned up and run other tests and I was left with the doctor to finish sewing up my incision. After I was moved to another room to recover Alyss was brought to me and I nursed her. Even though my belly was hurting and my episiotomy started to hurt as well whenever I held Alyss I felt better and forgot of all the pain. We stayed in the hospital for 2 days and went home on Sunday.

From start to end this pregnancy and birth were exactly as I always dreamed. I don't feel sad or unaccomplished when I think back at Jane's C-section birth but I'm very happy that I was able to experience a natural birth and was awake and alert when Alyss came into this world.
We love you very much little Alyss and are very happy and so excited that you joined our family.

34 Weeks Already?!?!?!

That's right. Believe it or not, I'm 34 weeks along. Only a few more weeks and Alyss will be here. Who knows, she might come a bit early. I wouldn't mind as long as she's healthy.

The last doctor's appointment went well, just like all the others. My blood pressure was good, urine good, measured 34cm and baby's heart rate was 148, also good. We've been discussing with the doctor what options do I have concerning the birth and after this last visit I really started thinking seriously if I want to try VBAC (vaginal birth after C-section) or a C-section again. We already have the C/S scheduled for the 15th of February (due date is the 20th) but I really felt recently that I'd like to try VBAC. The doctor isn't opposed to it but he said that he would need to refer me to a doctor in Provo or Salt Lake so that I could give birth at a big and well-equipped hospital, in case of an emergency and the necessity of a C/S. I've done some research and it seems that VBAC is totally possible and it can be successful but there is a chance for the baby to not get enough oxygen or for a uterine rupture. The main reason why I'm still considering the C/S is because with Jane I tried to deliver vaginally but, even though I dilated to 10cm she never descended and her heart rate was not very stable. I fear that it might happen again so I've decided to not get an epidural for as long as I can manage, and to walk around, not just lay in bed. I might even consider to get in the tub at some point. I remember that last time, even though the contractions hurt I felt better when I would stand and walk than when I stayed in bed and I got horrible back pain. I also hope that walking and standing will help the baby position herself and descend and also will help me dilate without the use of pitocin. They will not give me pitocin because it creates violent contractions, which could be dangerous for my previous incision. So, I feel good about trying VBAC and I really hope that I will be able to do it and not have to take tons of medications and endure the pain and recovery after a C/S. I want to be able to take care of my babies afterwards, with David working a lot and me being at home with both of them. We'll let the doctor know of the decission next week, at the next appointment, when I'll also ask him to check that Alyss is head down and getting ready to make her appearance into the world. I've been having Braxton Hicks contractions on and off and I feel pressure in my pelvis so I know that my body is getting ready for the big event. I also get occasional back pain and the aches in my pelvis, all the way around are pretty bad, especially after I go on walks but, just like last time, I plan on walking all the way until the last day. It makes me happy and I know it's good for me and the baby, plus Jane really enjoys our walks as well. Can't wait for Alyss to get here, to see her and hold her close. I'm nervous about what it's going to be like and how Jane will react but I'm also excited to have another little girl and the chance to be the Mommy of a newborn once more. I love being pregnant and I love babies and am happy that David is always by my side, supports me, comes to all the appointments and is just as excited about our baby girls as I am.

Changes, struggles, togetherness, life...

Well,we've had an ok year so far and I kind of forgot to be depressed. It's not that I enjoy it but last year we had so much depressing stuff going on that I had a hard time staying positive.
It's now almost the end of November and life's turned a bit on the depressing side again... We were going to move to NYC for David's school in August but they asked us to postpone it until December. Borders closed down and David lost his job there, so we moved from our apartment in Springville to David's parents' condo in Midway. We're very thankful for their help but it's still not the same as having our own place and with the snow coming in a lot more up here, winter would be really hard and unpredictable with David not being able to always make it to work or back home after work.
Anyway, at the begining of November David's school told us that his program is entirely online now and we don't have to move anymore. That was good news cause it would cost a lot less for his school and we wouldn't have to move during winter, with a young child and me pregnant. The downside is that we stopped looking for more reiable and better paying jobs since we thought we'd be leaving so now, we dont have many, if any options concerning where we'd be staying and if we could even afford the doctor visits for me and Jane. Heaven forbid any emergencies! Last week one of my fillings fell out and it was awful. We used a credit card to pay to have a new filling put in but it only proved how unprepared and poor we are in case of any unexpected expense and even in the case of expected ones. We looked at apartments and any two bedroom apartment, even the crappy ones, cost around $600/month plus utilities if you're lucky to find a deal. Even though David got a promotion a couple of months ago at Simply Mac, we still can't afford a decent enough place. We want to move before the bad snow comes in, before I get even bigger and definitely before Alyss is born but while I'm being optimistic and try to budget so that we might be able to make it work, David reminds me how we might not have enough money for food and definitely no money for any, even small emergency. I don't want to put our family in a situation where we woud have to be kicked out of an apartment and I definitely feel that since I don't work I shouldn't be the one deciding on our future. But I want to be positive and have faith that things WILL work out soMehow for us. David has a couple of job interviews lined up and the apartment we found is small and nothing even close to modern but clean and in a good neighborhood. It's close to David's work, so the weather won't be a problem, and it's close to grocery stores so I could shop for dinner if I need to and I won't feel secluded, like in Midway, away from even a road where Jane and I could go for walks.
So, I really don't like being in this situation again, where we don't know what will happen to us and if we can take care of ourselves. It is depressing when the afordable housing apartment gives you a limit for your income, where we'd be makjng too much to stay there, and you don't even make half that limit. We are happy to be together, to have Jane and to be expecting another bundle of joy in less than three months but given these circumstances, we feel that we want to be able to provide for our babies and at least give them the bare necessities a baby is in need of. We hope that things will work out soon and that we will make the best decisions for the future.

Bebe 2 Ultrasound Pictures

Ultrasound 1 at 13 Weeks 2 Days

On her tummy, bent legs - 13 Weeks

On her tummy, straight legs 

On her back - she moved a lot :)

Lifted her head

Ultrasound 2 at 24 Weeks 

Her face and tummy 

Her arm 

Her little heart

Her leg

She turned on the other side - her head and body again

Face detail - her lips 

Her hand